The Mother came home yesterday. It was nice. She woke from her snooze around 5pm and we had cocktails. She regaled me with stories from her youth while Special Man Friend made dinner. This was the earliest we have eaten dinner all year. I think I'm going to enjoy our new schedule.
The Mother told me about nursing school in the 40s, dating medical students, taking classes, going to frat parties, etc. I hope to draw her out more on that subject in the coming months. While in nursing school in Toronto she noticed one of the maternity ward patients was an unmarried high school classmate giving birth. The Mother asked the nun in charge of that ward to transfer her to another ward so the patient wouldn't notice someone she knew working in the hospital. While my first thought was that the young mother would be comforted by a familiar face, The Mother had to explain that in the 40s, this young patient was hoping to hide her pregnancy and birth from everyone she knew. The Mother was doing her a kindness by not intruding on her classmate, not making that young woman deal with the fact that someone knew her secret. It was a different world.
Not all of The Mother's stories are sad. She also told me about being set up on a date with her future husband. Apparently her girlfriend described Bill as a "Greek god" who needed to be taken down a peg or two. So The Mother, herself somewhat of a hot commodity, set out to humble the Adonis and ended up in love with the kindest, least conceited demigod ever to grace SLU's campus. He took her out for a beer, because that's all anyone could afford. There was a famous local singer who everyone went to see, Flo May Sharp(?). Her voice was so entrancing that no one talked while she sang, they just sat, enraptured, until she was done. They never went dancing. I expect to hear this story frequently.
In between tales of days gone by, The Mother would comment on the new furniture in her house, and occasionally ask about her cat and plans for the next day. It was impossible to miss the fact that she was unsure of the nature of our presence in her home. Were we visiting? Were we spending the night? Would Special Man Friend be returning in the morning? Which room were we in? Which room was she in? Later in the evening I asked him if she knew I'd be spending the night. His response: I don't think so.
At one point she decided to walk back to a bedroom - there was something in her suitcase she wanted to show me. I asked her if I should come with her and she said no. Special Man Friend, meanwhile, is gesturing at me to get up and follow The Mother down the hallway. I shrugged and he followed on his own then returned, admonishing me that the hallway is long and we should watch her. This is the sort of thing we're going to have to work out. That hallway IS long. But she clearly stated that she didn't want company. So what is the right thing to do? Follow her around all day like a pesky, unwanted shadow? I don't think so. Leave her to her own devices? Man Friend was right, she might very well forget what she was doing in the bedroom in the first place and it is a very long way for a wobbly walker. My general take on it is, So what? We can't, and shouldn't, stop her from moving around - it's good for her. We can, and should, keep tabs on where she is but there's no need to pester the lady. And frankly, her mobility was about as good today as I've ever witnessed.
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